Ways to Happiness
The Happy Circumstances that are the Secret to a Happy Life
What are the ways to happiness and the secret of a happy life? How do
we find true happiness and avoid the futile pursuit of happiness?
Science tells us the elements of happiness that lead most directly to a
happy life and the ones that we think will make us happy and don't.
In his book, Authentic Happiness, Dr. Martin Seligman says that our
overall life happiness is made up of our happiness set point, our life
circumstances and our thoughts and actions. The ways to happinessare to maximize our happy thoughts, happy actions and happy circumstances as best we can and don't worry about the rest.
The most immediate and effective way to find true happiness is to train yourself to think happy thoughts like being grateful, or loving, or optimistic. Optimism is one secret to a happy life.
To the extent that we have control over our circumstances, this is one
of the other ways to happiness. You can maximize your happiness by
seeking out happy circumstances. Surprisingly, healthy, wealthy and
wise (or at least advanced degrees) are not ways to happiness. Here are
the circumstances, the elements of happiness, that do make a positive
difference:
How to Find True Happiness
1) Think Happy Thoughts and Engage in Happy Actions
These two paths are sure ways to raise your happiness level. They are two of the secrets of a happy life.
2) Country Where You Live
People who live in wealthy, democratic countries are markedly happier
than those who live in impoverished dictatorships. Study after study
shows that once your basic physical needs for survival, food, water,
and shelter are met, more money doesn't necessarily bring happiness.
However, people in poverty- wherever they live- tend to have somewhat
less life satisfaction. People in democracies, where there is some hope
of movement out of poverty and some element of social stability and
peaceful change of leadership tend to be more satisfied with life
overall. Although there is a strong statistical correlation between
living in a wealthy democracy and higher life satisfaction, this is
often not an element of happiness that people can easily change.
3) Marriage
Married people are generally happier than single people, although it is
not clear if being married makes you happier or being happier makes you
more likely to get married, marriage shows up strongly as one of the
ways to happiness. People who are happier with life are also usually
happier in their marriages.
4) Rich Social Network
Married or single, people that spend a lot of time with friends and who
have a lot of friends are happier. Like marriage, it is not clear which
comes first, happiness or friends. Of all the circumstances that we can
generally control, this one correlates most strongly to over all
happiness levels. The Dalai Lama
explains the link between good relationships and the secret to
happiness "We humans are social beings. We come into the world as the
result of others' actions. We survive here in dependence on others.
Whether we like it or not, there is hardly a moment of our lives when
we do not benefit from others' activities. For this reason it is hardly
surprising that most of our happiness arises in the context of our
relationships with others."
5) Spiritual Beliefs
People with strong religious beliefs tend to be a little happier than
others. Although this correlation holds for all types of spiritual
beliefs, people with more fundamentalist beliefs tend to be slightly
happier than people with more open beliefs. The correlation between
spirituality and a happy life is not as strong as poverty and social
life, but it is there and it does make a difference.
6) Life Events
People who live through negative events like the death of someone
close, war, or disaster tend to be a little sadder than those who are
more fortunate. Again, this correlation is not as strong as poverty and
social life and usually is not within our control.
How to Avoid the Futile Pursuit of Happiness
The following elements DO NOT
correlate to a happier life. This means that having more of these
things in your life will not necessarily make you happier and having
less will not make you sadder. These things don't interfere with over
life satisfaction and happiness, they have no effect one way or
another. So, if you are looking for ways to happiness, don't waste your
time here.
1) More Money
Once you have enough money to meet your basic needs for food, shelter
and safety, money has little effect on your overall happiness level.
2) Optimal Health
Moderate poor health does not bring lasting unhappiness, but severe
illness does. So, to live a happy life, pay attention to your health so
you can life a long life without severe illness and you can feel good
physically as much as possible, but there is no need to chase after the
perfect body to be happy.
3) Advanced Degrees
The education level as measured by school and academic degrees does not
impact the overall happiness level. True wisdom is another matter.
There is deep wisdom in happiness, but not the kind you can measure
with an advanced degree.
4) Race
Race does not impact over all happiness.
5) Climate
Moving to a better climate is not one of the ways to happiness.
Based on this research, the ways to happiness are:
1) Happy Thoughts and Activities
2) Rich Social Network of Good Relationships
The way to find true
happiness is to spend time with your family and friends
doing things you all enjoy and notice and appreciate how much you enjoy
it. Avoid the
futile pursuit of happiness by spending less time and
energy on getting rich or having the perfect something without
appreciating how much you already are rich or already have perfect.
These are the elements of happiness.
So, in the words of Bobby McFerrin,
Don't worry,
Be happy.
Try these secrets of a happy life for more ways to happiness.
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