We are more likely to succeed when we focus on what we want instead of what we do not want.

Happy New Year!

About 60% of us make New Year’s resolutions to change some personal habit. People who make resolutions and write them down are 10 times more likely to succeed at personal changes than those who do not make resolutions. Even so, more than half of us will fail to keep our resolutions and make the changes we wanted. From University of Scranton, Journal of Clinical Psychology . You can improve your goal success by working on happiness first with these three tips.

First, focus on what you want instead of what you don’t want. We can motivate ourselves to change through fear or desire. Both work. However, fear invokes our negative emotions and the fight or flight response. It releases adrenaline and cortisol (stress hormones) to increase our short term strength, endurance, and narrow our focus. These responses can be helpful in the short term, but over time, they tear down our health and make it more difficult for us to find new, creative ways to meet our goals. Desire and other positive emotions draw us towards something. We feel good when we think about what we want, releasing endorphins and oxytocin; hormones that help us feel “high” and feel connected to other people. Positive emotions enhance our creativity and problem solving skills, making it easier to overcome obstacles between us and the object of our desire.

Next, get to the root of your desire. Often, our goals represent just one way we can get what we want, but not necessarily the only way or the best way. For example, if our goal is to make $1 million, we might really be looking for financial security or the ability to work at a job we enjoy. It might be more expedient to change to a job we enjoy or start a rainy day savings account, than make a $1 million, and it might be more satisfying in the long run.

Finally, consider the people closest to you and what you want for them. Happy people are connected people. They know that the best solutions are the ones that meet everyone’s needs at the same time and respect our interconnectedness. When your goals get you what you really want and benefit others at the same time, you get a triple boost of happiness and the support of your community in meeting your goal.

When you set your goals for peace, love and happiness, you are more likely to succeed at meeting your goal and at enjoying the fruits of your labor.

We are more likely to succeed when we focus on what we want instead of what we do not want.

To Subscribe