Coping with Job Loss

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Coping with Job Loss

Emotion Focused Coping Skills to Help You Stay Positive

Part 2 of a 3 Article Series

Coping with job loss often means coping with a loss of identity, connection to a social group, and a source of satisfaction as well as coping with a loss of income. To stay positive, you must find ways to meet these emotional needs as well as your financial ones. This article outlines three specific emotion focused coping skills to keep us looking up.

1. Positive Self Talk
We all have a running dialog going in our heads. Sometimes when bad things happen to us, we are the first to beat ourselves up in this internal dialog. We tell ourselves we will never work again, or we deserved this layoff because we are stupid, or lazy, or we do not fit in. Sometimes we blame others because it is easier to lash out at someone you know than the economy. If you can identify these messages and dispute them with yourself, you can change them over time. Many people find that keeping a journal helps with this. Or, try talking to a friend who helps you identify your messages to yourself.

2. Optimistic Thinking
According to Dr. Martin Seligman, author of the book Learned Optimism, optimists attribute temporary reasons to their failures and permanent reasons to their successes. An optimist would think -- It is just bad luck that I lost my job in a recession. I am smart and competent and will get another one. A pessimist is more likely to attribute the layoff to their own failings. As you become aware of your self talk, look for these optimistic and pessimistic patterns. Research has shown that when you dispute your pessimistic thinking patterns, you can immediately benefit by seeing more solutions and over time, you will become more optimistic naturally.

3. Focus on What You Want
When you find yourself getting angry or frightened, think about what you want. Imagine your ideal job, or how you will feel when you are doing useful things you enjoy for others. This helps in three ways. First, imagining happy things shifts your body and brain chemistry to reduce the symptoms and damage of stress. Next, our brains naturally want to solve problems and be right about the future, so give your brain the future you want. Finally, focusing on what we want invokes the law of attraction, as outlined in the Rhonda Byrne book, The Secret.

There is no question; surviving a layoff is hard and coping with job loss takes work. To take action in the face of change and uncertainty requires courage and the skill to focus on what we can do. But, science does show that positive self talk, optimistic thinking, and a solutions focus do make a difference in our ability to solve problems and deal with the physical impacts of stress. By practicing these skills, you can survive a layoff and any other life challenge that comes your way.

This article, Coping with Job Loss, is part 2 of a 3 part series. You might also enjoy Part 1- Surviving a Layoff. How to Stay Positive When Coping with Job Loss. and Part 3- Coping with Layoffs. How To Survive a Depression With Your Smile Intact.